Mondays With Mother

My journey with my mother as she enters the fog of Alzheimer's
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Mother began her work as an English teacher at Coventry High School in the 1960's. This is a picture of her at Coventry High in 1975, a year before I graduated. By then she had moved from teaching English to being a guidance counselor. She retired from there in 1989.
 

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Yes, we managed to make it out for ice cream yet another time. Well, maybe that's not obvious since this is just a picture of us with a goat, but if you remember back to the other pictures of Beech Hill Farm, you'll know that this is just a couple of miles from the Birches and they have great ice cream. They also have a bunch of farm animals (thus the goats) and a corn maze (which we declined to try).

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What does it mean to visit? I have been to The Birches twice since my last posting, but it's hard to know what to say.

The first time I arrived to find Mother with sevearl other ladies in the TV room. She looked up, "Well, you never know who you're going to see here!" she said with a smile. Next to Mother on the couch was a woman holding a birthday card for someone who had turned 90 years old. Maybe it was hers, maybe not, but she looked at it many times, taking in the beauty of the artwork, but then opening the card to find the inside blank.

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I headed up to The Birches today, arriving about 2 pm. I found Mother in the TV room with several other ladies. She looked up at me and smiled and said, "Oh, hello!" and I sat down next to her. She had a throw pillow on her lap and was trying to do something unknown with the edging around the pillow. A woman next to her, wearing a straw hat with a huge sunflower on it, decided that she really wanted to have that pillow. So Mother put it down next to the woman and patted it. She looked around the room and counted the chairs aloud.

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I've actually been to The Birches twice since my last post. Once was for a family gathering on July 4. The Birches does a barbeque and invites families, so we went for that. David had reserved the private dining room, so we weren't with the others, and only Rob and Laurie rounded out the family crowd. Rob and I went up together.

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It's a day with "memory" built into the name, but I spent it at the place of forgetting. David, Laurie, and I gathered with Mother at The Birches for lunch. They are very good at recognizing holidays and occasions and many residents were gathered around the outdoor grills for the salads and burgers and hot dogs so common on the holiday.

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Since David and I both serve churches a good distance from Concord, NH, we couldn't get to The Birches for a Mother's Day lunch. So, like last year, we met at a lovely restaurant down the street at about 2:30 to celebrate both Mother's Day and several May birthdays, including hers. Aside from the fact that some roads were flooded and we had trouble getting there (we've had about 6 inches of rain and it's still coming), the meal was good and it was a pleasant enough afternoon. Mother didn't say much, and I can't say there is anything striking to report.

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It's a little late to be posting about an Easter visit, but with a couple of weeks of vacation right afterwards, I just haven't gotten to it. Rather than going to The Birches for Easter this year, we decided to try an outing and bring Mother to us. The gathering was at Marie's and after coming to Sunrise service, Rob went up to get Mother while David and I tended our churches on that busy morning.

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Today was actually the second time I've visited since I last posted. The last time was in mid-March when we gathered at the Birches to celebrate Laurie's birthday. Today I took advantage of the warmest day of the season so far to head north, see some contractors at my cabin, and stop in at The Birches.

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I actually did have another visit inbetween today and the last one, but it was a family gathering and there really wasn't much to report. Today I went up on my own and found Mother with 25 or so others in the Great Room upstairs celebrating a birthday. They have a big birthday bash for everyone's birthday, and today it was the turn for a woman named Paulie. There was cake and ice cream and an ancient pianist strapped into a special chair on the piano bench. He was playing the old songs from the forties and everybody had a booklet to sing along.